The ugly truth

This is not going to be my usual post deep in reflection but rather more of a diary entry where I get to vent out in my own safe ‘private’ space. Life is strange these days. We are in a kind of Covid limbo where we are neither in motion again nor stationary. What is that state? How does one acclimatise to an undefined existence where it is risky to get going but equally dangerous to stay put?

Work is picking up for us in the office which is great, but it just means that we are falling into the old patterns of our daily existence being driven by the frenzy of new orders. The daily walk which was so therapeutic and refreshing has now reverted back to a chore that needs to be gotten out of the way so that we can spend more time doing the real meaningless chores and be more (or rather less) productive at work.

Throughout the day I often go to twitter for a bit of respite. I encounter fantastic humour there, really interesting people too and I love how most feel they have the freedom to say what they are really thinking and not the measured responses that we often give face to face, because we feel we need to restrain ourselves or else we may come across as human. Perish the thought! Having said that, sometimes that very same veil which gives others a mask to hide behind, can be the sword that cuts both ways. If you are observant enough, if you are patient enough and look closely enough, you realise that whilst some can use that veil of anonymity to propel them into sincerity, there are others who abuse the freedom that such invisible curtain gives them and choose to give an impression of being who they are in order to gain your trust, use you and discard you afterwards.

I am a sucker for honesty and transparency. Deception on the other hand curdles my blood and turns me inside out. People who give compliments because they want something from you and as soon as they realise they are not getting it, forget you even exist, are for me subhuman, if I am honest. Trusting another human being is completely exhausting, but what really wears my soul down is when you believe someone has a genuine interest in who you are as a person only to discover soon after it was all an act. They don’t offer friendship to see what they can do for you but rather they understand friendship only in terms of what you can do for them. It is the new shopping trend. Do what you have to do, use whichever tactic you need to successfully shop for more followers or individuals you can use to satisfy your own needs. Be all things to all people and lose your soul and your heart in the process seems to be today’s new mantra. At what point did the notion of integrity become obsolete, unfashionable, unnecessary?

I used to believe in the kindness of strangers but I am becoming increasingly disillusioned with such prospect. We are so blinded by a culture of consumerism, we stop at nothing in our frenzy and greed, not even other human beings. We chew them, suck up the life out of them and we spit them back out when there’s nothing left for us! We change our alliances and whom we give favour to like we change clothes everyday. The dehumanization of the human species is not far ahead if you ask me.

What do you know? What was meant as a diary entry has turned into another heavy rant. Well, this is me, warts and all! Come back at your own peril.

7 thoughts on “The ugly truth

  1. I think social media can be a challenging platform to express integrity. Integrity, sincerity, and honesty are quiet values that take time to uncover and appreciate. Unfortunately taking the time to get to know someone, or taking the time to do something right, is nowadays viewed by many as old fashioned. It’s a casualty of productivity I guess. It’s too bad because these old school values are full of meaning and authenticity, which are the very things some of these hollow social media “influencers” crave.
    Anyway keep writing and have a good weekend!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Rikki Murray

    Hi there , loved your diary/ blog “dia /blog ” , an excellent read I can’t argue with what you have written, however don’t lose the hope that through the quagmire of social media trolls, fake friends and the pond life there is a very , very thin but rich seam of genuine ” strangers” who if you pull on their threads will lift you out of the murky depths and will no longer become “faceless strangers ” that you fear , and perhaps even become a ” face of friendship” behind a touch screen glass .
    Don’t give up hope , some people still cling onto the old values of integrity, decency and dignity – we are the “freedom fighters” of the social media age – please come join us stranger !

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Rikki. Thank you for your comment. Have had some dreadful experiences on social media as you can probably gather. I don’t trust easily at the best of times but I’m not sure one can ever fully trust anyone with whom we communicate on social media where there’s no real accountability. Freedom fighters however who have integrity, decency and dignity Id like to become acquainted with. Have not encountered many on twitter so far though. Everybody has vested interests in what they follow. Unconditional love or support is extremely rare on social media in my opinion. I’m a genuine person so the way I see it is: if I can be authentic and decent on here, I’d like to think others should too.


  3. The nature of the beast, for good or ill. For you, mostly ill it would seem. Maybe view it for what it is, which can also provide humour, education, uplift and the occasional contretemps. I find a break is necessary from time to time. Enjoy the good bits, discard the rest.😊
    Glad to see you still writing. Keep going..

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s